What happens when the gods forget the rituals

I had awakened and managed to turn the coffee pot on to heat before beginning the dishes. Doing anything before my fix in the morning is risky business as not even my eyes function properly without a liberal infusion of coffee. This is why even though I have one of those devices that allow you to program it to make coffee in the morning, I still make a pot at night. I have been known to load it without coffee, water or more horribly, the pot, set the time and discover my mistake in the morning when I am in no condition to rectify it. Thus, I just make a pot at night.
Now I know someone will send me an advertisement for one of those one cup coffee makers that are fool proof. Ah, but what kind of fool drinks one 6 ounce cup of coffee? Six ounces doesn't even fill my cup. Six ounces doesn't even spark much let alone get my brain cells to fire. What kind of creature is so weak it gets off on 6 OUNCES of coffee??? What is the world coming to? The end must be near! But, on to the narrative...
I had a small but mighty Fire winding around my ankles as I washed the dishes of the night before, cleaned the counter and cleaned the sink having finally slain that porcelain and glass dragon. The Fire was getting more and more aggravated so I found a little dish and much to my dismay discovered I missed the polyplasticawhatalene dragon. I gave it a good scrub and when to the great cabinet of all offerings: the refrigerator.
Within the magic cabinet, I found a jar of chicken and carefully dished out just enough for a Fire and put it down. Squirrel tail in the air, he gave it a dismissive twitch. I moved it to the counter and he arose on strange air currents to give it a nose in the air dismissal. Clearly I did not know where the proper altar was located and my status as cat goddess was in danger, so I chose the only other position, the kitchen box of perfect cat height of limited life span as it also doubles as a scratching post to the non-believers in our little furdom. This time I got the look as another cat with few philosophical concerns leaped up and cleaned the offering plate. Josephina is a heretic.
Now I knew I was in trouble, serious trouble. Either Fire was sick or I was doing something wrong so did the only sane thing a human can do, I poured that first cup of coffee to get my brain cells firing. The first cup is always the sweetest, even though it is bitter from air exposure over night, overheated and needs a liberal dose of cream, preferably the kind I make with a little sweetener and flavor.
It had been way too long to be operating without my drug of need and I was failing in goddesshood so you can understand I was a bit flustered and needy. Fire was sitting on the kitchen floor threatening to expose my weakness to a gaggle of carnivores who were perfectly capable of purring me into unconsciousness with their secret weapon, the Zompurr, and then eating me for dinner. I had to have coffee, but I couldn't even get my own ritual to the bean god of caffeine right. I poured the cream mix into the cup before the coffee. This demonstrated I was in no condition to be upright and suddenly, Fire sprang from the floor to the counter in a perfect 4 point landing nose in my cup almost getting a scorched from falling coffee. I grabbed him with the other hand as his entire body reoriented to the cream cup like a milk seeking missile.
With cat under one arm I managed the coffee, chugged a drink of mind clearing wonder and decided to retreat to my bedroom to write. Oh No! I had the sacred offering of the great and wonderful Goddess of Mook in my hand and Fire was not letting me out of his sight. As soon as I ceased to move I knew a Fire would fly into my arms trusting me catch him as his head dunked in a hot coffee cup. Clearly something had to be done.
Thus, I dragged George out of his nap and informed him loudly I had to be taught the great Mook Ritual and upon which sacred house site to preform it. It was a good thing I surrendered to ignorance and sought knowledge as I would never have known the ritual is shared by Conner, the elder, and Fire, the Novus, on a special spot on the rolling steel center isle in the special white plastic offering dish.
And now, I shall enjoy my cup of Joe.

What Do They Think???

Having awoken from my slumber, an act I really need to rethink: either the slumber or awakening, I found that Rusty and Trouble of the Furry 7 had gathered everything they could find all night resembling a cord into a pile in the dining room floor which they were proudly guarding.
Unfortunately, the act of ferreting out and gathering these treasures caused measurable damage to the rest of the house.

The only good news is that they remembered their training and didn't touch any electrical cords or the damage would have been major.

I think you can figure out who is Rusty and who is Trouble.







After completing the picture for this article I praised the gods of digital. It 37 photos and massive editing to produce those two pictures, something that I never could have achieved before digital cameras and computers.....just something to think about.....I remember an animal photographer who used to set aside one day for each photo shoot per animal and go through an entire block of film....

Yeah Fire, You Go Bro....

In more than one way we would like to point out.

Fire passed his Friday Vet check with flying colors. He has gained weight and grown. He required no enema. He was in tip top shape and so exhausted when he got home, he has been sleeping all afternoon.

I guess a thermometer up the rear takes it out of you.

We are so happy. He just might make it!!!!

Yea Fire!

I am so happy to announce that Fire endures his enema every night like a little trooper without even one yowl. His bowls move afterwards and he has even gained an ounce. He might just make it. We have our fingers crossed the progress will continue.

Kittens are just like Children

And some days...so are husbands.
I walked into the kitchen and George and Fire are eyeball to eyeball. George is yelling, "Spit it out. Spit it Out!"
Fire has those little jaws clamped shut tighter than a bear trap and the look of determination of a world class athlete on his face.. And suddenly the little bright pink tongue comes out and goes all the way over the nose just for show. He has swallowed it.
George is still in 'spit it out mode' and I said, "Too late, he just swallowed."
Fire has the most self satisfied look on his face.
"By-the-way, what did he swallow?"
"A piece of dry cat food."
Because of his bowel problems he is not allowed dry cat food. Over and over I had said that dry cat is the cookie and the cookie jar has to be removed because he can smell it. He found a tiny piece another cat had dropped earlier in the morning.
Score: Fire 1, George 0.

Survived the Vet

Fire had his standing Friday appointment complete with the good drugs and a total emptying. He had a huge hard plug at the end that I had not been able to move and the rest was, for the first time, soft.

We let him rest last night.

Tonight I gave him a complete enema and he emptied completely. It looks like he is doing okay for the time being. We will see if I can keep this going for the whole week. The problem is when he gets too big to restrain if he makes it that long.

I saw Purdy von Sweets staring at the ceiling walking in a circle and wondered what on earth was going on. She had the piece of tape off the organic cantaloupe caught in the end of her tail, which she was holding straight up and was turning in a circle watching it. Some days, she is not the brightest bulb in the pack. I think it is all the caffeine she has managed to drink.

Fire's brothers and sisters are getting too big to keep in the cage and they have half a day of play or destruction depending on how you look at it. I found Trouble in, yes IN, the chandelier, happily swinging back and forth. There is no place they have not managed to reach. When I find them all laid out snoozing, I put them back in the cage.

Ambrosia

Today Guest Cat Blogger is Fionna, the little queen.

We hadz ze bestest of ze bestest. Mommy fixz the salmon fishy for Fire and she lets us lickz ze growl thingie. We don'z noz why ze growl thingies no eat the salmon but we iz thankful. Then she letz us lickz ze bowl and ze spoon. AMBROSIA! We iz happy kittz.

Napoleon iz strange. He eatz ze Kefir and not ze salmonz. That iz strange!

Now we iz resting in ze dirty clothez. It iz a good day.

No one tell her the clothes are headed for the washing machine later......

A Bad day in Fire Land

After yesterday's success, a super hard plug came down and the poor baby has had 2 enemas with no success but I think I have finally softened his stool enough to where as soon as the pain abates, he can give it a good push. At first, I couldn't even get the catheter in him he was so blocked.

Finally an emergency trip to CVS, netted a baby's ear bubble thingie and that softened it enough with warm water to get the catheter into him. But, nothing came out. So an hour later a different enema, this time instead of the soapy water stuff, mineral oil and sugar laxative solution and I think he may survive the night without too much pain.

I hate to say it but from what I removed, I am not certain he wasn't eating kitty litter. We removed all litter a day ago to better monitor his bowls but I swear part of his stool was litter. He is one miserable little boy but I am hoping he will sleep for a while.

Meanwhile, Napoleon is one miserable little boy as he ate the lion's share of the catnip I brought in and I think he has a hangover.

Another Day in the Life of Fire

As you know, he pulled off the great Tuna Steak Heist. What you don't know is he isn't supposed to eat something like that as we need to keep his bowels soft. He plugged up big time and was bloated and sick. So, I had to do the thing I never wanted to do. I had to put the catheter up him and give him an enema.

There is nothing like a kitten screaming his lungs out even though you are using a numbing solution on the catheter to wrench your heart out. But, I did it, twice, and much to our shock and glee, he managed to move his bowels by himself with a few screams! The vet has to milk it out of his colon. He was exhausted and sore, but now he is so happy and back to his bouncy little self.

Unfortunately, tomorrow will probably require a repeat performance on my part. I have never been so exhausted in my life and had to shower because I was covered in sweat from the stress.

I have a happy Napoleon as he has had both Kefir and yogurt today. That is a good day in his world.

Now it is time for me to call it a day and get some rest. There is so much to do and now that I know I can take care of Fire, a lot of the weight is off my shoulders. Through all the pain, and he was in pain, he never once tried to bite George and barely tried to scratch us. He knows we are helping him. Sometimes the sick ones are the sweetest ones. They know you are trying to help them.

Flabbergasted!!!

Last night I accused one Trouble of the great Tuna Steak Raid on the stove. He has demanded a retraction though I am certain he nibbled some of the spoils, maybe....maybe not. Pictured above you can see him enjoying his vindication. That should last until I open the door to the cage.

As George was sitting on the stool at the stove, something flew over his head and executed a perfect four point landing in the precise location of last night's Tuna Heist. Much to everyone's complete shock, the furry missile turned out to be one Fire, the sick little kitty of the sweet face. This is the little kitty that I mourned the loss of his special tuna steak and lovingly fried him a salmon steak to replace it, watched its every cooking moment, cooled it and locked it in the fridge to protect it from the evil Tuna Thief. This is baby I broke off a hot piece of salmon for, burned my fingers, blew on it until it was cool and delivered it to his special bowl to commemorate the taking of the awful medicine. I even stood guard as he ate it.

And this is his answer to being caught red pawed on the stove where

he executed last night's daring heist and framed his brother:

I have been had.

Next to him is his brother Ice.

Snookered

Ever heard the saying "won the battle but lost the war"?


I had left the tuna steak in the little frying pan, covered, to cool enough to put in the fridge. When I came back, the lid was in the sink and the empty frying pan was on the stove so I thought George had packaged the tuna up and put it in the fridge.

After Fire's medication, I fixed his special food mixture of pumpkin, canned cat food and sunflower seed oil and went to get the piece of tune treat. It was nowhere to be found in the fridge so I called for George. He thought I put the tuna steak away as he found the lid on the stove and the frying pan empty.

Needless to say, we were raided. The cats got the whole tuna steak without knocking the frying pan down or dropping the lid. Trouble has been seen on the stove before and apparently he has refined his technique.

I had to fry a salmon steak for Fire and this time, I sat and watched the frying pan the whole time. There was no point in tempting fate or cats as we call it.

How to catch a Tuna

 Fire is a very sick little kitten. His nerves in his colon are not functioning so he must be manually evacuated and have medicine three times a day and two enemas. Our vet, Dr. Byron, doesn't think he will make it.
So we try to make his medicine as pleasant as possible as he is a fighter and wants to live badly. To do that, he is rewarded with a piece of tuna steak. Today, I ran out of tuna steak and had to cook another one. I had managed to cool it and was sitting it down for him in the kitchen when.....

There are two black kittens in the litter and we called them Ninja One and Two. They are both girls and they take their Ninja duties very seriously. Ninja One has practiced her stealth for hours, leaping, freezing with only the little eyes tracking her imaginary (we hope) prey and then leaping again. Today she was practicing her stealth and killing technique with the cats absolute favorite toy in the entire universe of toys: The Cat Spring pictured below and available from Amazon.com all the time or Pet Supermarket.

The next thing I know, she flings the Spring onto the Tuna, captures it and grabs the spring filled with Tuna and starts to run. She almost made it except I grabbed the Spring.

Well played little Ninja One, well played, but Ninja Mommy is faster.